Amwriting (v): a hashtag commonly used on social media to indicate when a writer is most distracted.
Book (n): the physical manifestation of the writer’s soul. Not to be confused with horcrux.
Creativity (n): a nutrient absorbed from caffeine.
Dialogue (v): to argue with one’s characters.
Editor (n): a medieval torture device.
Fan (n): 1. a device used to blow papers off a desk; 2. one who habitually smells books.
Grammar (n): a semi-transparent layer of red ink applied to a manuscript.
Heroism (n): a disease contracted upon excessive exposure to destiny.
Inciting [event] (n): the first character death.
Jail (n): the result of online search history.
Kill (v): 1. to take out frustration on a character; 2. to display power and authority over one or more character(s), a common intimidation strategy.
Love (n): 1. a three-sided geometrical shape; 2. a one-sided geometrical shape.
Mentor (n): a disposable cutout figure commonly found in cereal boxes.
Notebook (n): a detachable extension of the brain.
One (n): the hardest page.
Publisher (n): an elusive deity associated with Traditionalism.
Query (v): 1. to beg; 2. to believe in Santa Claus.
Research (n): a pseudo-productive variant of procrastination.
Subplot (n): an excuse to make two incompatible characters kiss.
Typo (n): a bacteria most visible five minutes after publication.
Uninterrupted (adj): a spiritual state of being only achieved in the afterlife.
Verbosity (n): a description of weather or scenery.
Write (v): 1. to convert sleep deprivation into ink squiggles; 2. to cry.
X (n): a red symbol applied by editors to express hopelessness.
Yarn (n): a tool invented to lure cats off keyboards.
Zebra (n): a placeholder noun commonly used in alphabetical blog posts.