Real-Life Conversation Snippets…No, For Real

Hey, everyone! This blog post is long overdue. It’s also probably the oddest blog post I’ll ever write.

Here’s the deal: during my last semester of college a year ago, I had an assignment for my Scriptwriting class. The assignment consisted of keeping a small notebook on my person at all times and jotting down out-of-context snippets of conversation I heard around campus.

Needless to say, this led to some rather interesting entries. A year after graduating, I still have the notebook. It’s been sitting in a box for far too long. Now, it’s time to unveil the secrets I’ve kept dormant.

These secrets are a potential goldmine for story dialog or random strangeness. I’ll be sure to incorporate them into my future writing…somehow.

I’m only sharing the very best from my notebook. For the sake of not losing friends, I’ll keep the sources anonymous. You, the reader, must take these snippets with a grain of salt. They are, after all, ripped out of their context.

“I need someone to demean. It’ll make me feel better since I’m doing math homework.”

“I have grapes and cranberries in my head.”

“I am a human being, not a stew. Go away.”

“Let’s travel to the depths of the pooper dome and retrieve the lasagna.”

“Don’t talk. I’ve seen your fingernail collection.”

“Oh, you got mail! At least someone cares about you.”

“Monkeys do it from the belly-button in.”

“Fine, I’ll just tuck it into my fat fold.”

“I found a eunuch!”

“Chocolate, dead cat…same difference.”

“Sometimes you don’t cover your mouth when you sneeze. You just look up and pretend to be a volcano.”

“I had leftover funeral food.”

“My lower intestine just quivered strangely.”


Should any of these real-life bits of conversation inspire you in your writing endeavors, don’t blame me. After all, I didn’t say any of them.

Do you ever write down out-of-context conversation snippets? What are some of the strangest lines you’ve heard out there?

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